What Parents Say

Advice from current foster and/or adoptive parents for future parents:

“Build your network at every opportunity and share your blessings with the network.  Others will be there for you when you need it, if you ask.  Respite, diapers, furniture, a cup of coffee… you never know the gifts of your community until you give and receive.”

“I love it and still want to foster even after this adoption.  Yes, it is hard.  I don’t know what I would do without family and friends.” – single foster parent

“Remember you are there to meet the needs of the child.  Provide structure, but be intentional and flexible.  Most of all…LOVE THAT KID TO PIECES!”

“You are a safe place for a child TODAY!  Take it one day at a time.”

“[Have] patience, and document everything.  Enjoy every minute with them, love them, and make lots of memories!!”

“Don’t get rid of them because they make a mistake.  Treat them like they’re your own.”

“Don’t take stuff personal.  Use your respite!  Be consistent!  Find a pediatrician, dentist, and optometrist.”

“Push past the fear… jump on in!”

“Document everything, know your strengths, work on weaknesses, take breaks, make a date night, take pictures, focus on the little things that are good, and most of all, patience is a virtue.”

“Take it one day at a time and when that becomes overwhelming moment by moment, love them and just keep going.  Cherish every step forward.”

“Network with other foster parents… you will learn more from them than any worker!”

“Don’t give up on what is right for the child.  Don’t stand for a mediocre answer.  Protect and nurture!  That’s your job.  If you don’t do it, no one will!”

“Go to court and all other appointments that the kids have.  Show them that you are there for them and you know what is going on with them in their time with you.”

“Find a church and go every single Sunday.  God may be the only consistent for them, and faith may be all they have to pull them through the day.”

“Provide a stable home and lots of encouragement.  The Magic House is also free for foster children and a great source for building social skills.”

“Love, love, love!  Keep them in church, teach them to pray.  Pray for them always.  Never give up!  Be realistic but never degrade where they came from.  Always give hope that they are the generation to change things for the better.”

“Love without fear.”

“Take to the doctor every kid you get in care the first 24 hours.  Document Everything.  Stand strong.  Pray.  And, most important – we Love you for doing this.”

“Practice patience… As a foster kid there’s a lot of thoughts and emotions going on inside.  We don’t always know ourselves why we are acting out.  Just because a foster kid doesn’t seem grateful that doesn’t mean they are not.  Maybe its new to be treated in a better way or maybe they don’t know how to express their appreciation.” -former foster youth

“Treat them and love them like they are your own children.”

“Start building your village as soon as possible.  Keep in touch with people from your training, and network to meet experienced foster parents.  Help them when they need it, and ask for help when you need it (because you will).  The village of foster parents will make your life so much easier.  They will help you navigate the system to advocate for your child, give you a new and/or different perspective on every situation, and help you find resources for your family.  The people in my village have held my sanity together, benefited my daughter tremendously, and have enriched my life.  They are some of my dearest, closest friends, and they understand and love my daughter and I as individuals, and as a family, in a way that non-foster parents can’t.”

“Do for them like you would do for your children’s love and respect…”